My belief has always been that people will change interpret the facts to suit their beliefs, rather than have the facts challenge their belief structure.
- That's why the piece of filth that comes home and beats his wife and kids thinks of himself as a "good guy" because he earns a paycheque.
- That's why people who steal things from work can sleep at night, because they can't consider their company as a victim.
- That's why if you were against this war before it started, you're probably still against it despite the scenes of happy Iraqis, drunk with the heady brew of liberation.
Iraqis deface a mural in Khaaneqin, the first major northern city to fall to coalition forces
- That's why if you were for this war before it started, you would still be for it after this:
Ali Ismaeel Abbas, 12 was left badly burned and missing both arms after a coalition missile attack
"When the facts change I change my mind. What do you do?"
We will always be confronted with things that won't fit into our worldview - I started as a staunch conservative early in life, mostly in following my parents, who had seen war in Europe and had come to Canada to build a better life afterward. For them, World War II was a just war, even though my grandfather was lost fighting for the Wehrmacht as a Private in 1942. Did my grandfather think that he was an evil man because he fought for Germany and Hitler? Probably not, though I never got to talk to him about it.
University life exposed me to the other side and sparked a more critical thought process. I didn't see so much black and white, good and evil as I did shades of gray and nationalist motives. I began to question; I began to play the oh-so-easy Canadian pastime of "Bash the Americans." Let's be frank here: it's easy to do because it's always easy to bash the leaders in any field - the microscope is ALWAYS on them and any misstep is recorded for posterity to be trotted out on display later at Starbucks over expensive venti lattes.
What brought me back to the other side away from my "enlightenment?" Simple pragmatism. The fact that I started to believe in a world where there were no absolutes, that supposedly no one was inherently good or evil, that God may or may not [heresy!] exist and that maybe there was no such thing as "my destined path"...heady stuff from the alcohol-soaked mind of an unemployed 22-year old.
What became important to me were the facts and not the all-emcompassing garbage statement of "It's all the AMERICAN's fault!" Someone's actual actions became more important to me in judging that person than what someone else said about them...It's conceptually impossible for EVERYTHING in the world to be America's fault, so by taking that position and ignoring the other factors involved, the "Peace" protesters are being intellectually LAZY.
For many years it was believed as a fact that any war fought in the 20th century would spiral out of control and result in the extermination of us all because neither of the two Superpowers would back down and escalation was guaranteed. This belief still survives in many of us today in its simplistic form of "War is Bad" and should "never be fought for any reason."
The truth is that the facts have changed in the 21st century. This isn't Star Trek. There isn't some stupid Prime Directive. The Americans are running the only Superpower on the planet. There are many that will hold America responsible in this century for their INACTIONS as much as their ACTIONS. The responsibility of attempting the greatest good for the greatest number of people will produce results such as Ali Ismaeel Abbas - that's almost guaranteed.
The challenge will be to see Abbas as part of the bigger picture: How many Abbas will be prevented because Saddam will no longer be there to torture Iraqis? We may never be able to know - and part of the challenge will be not to lose our humanity when dealing with the choices presented by the numbers: no one can possibly say it was fair to Ali Ismaeel Abbas, but is he enough to condemn this war as an immoral action? Or would the victims of Saddam be enough to condemn the U.S. for immoral INACTION had they not stopped him?
With Power comes Responsibility and Accountability.
So what am I now? If pragmatism were a political belief system I would define myself as a Pragmatist.
When the facts change I change my mind. What do you do?
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When I was a horny university student (more than a DECADE ago; my how time flies!) I lived in the Place Vanier residence at UBC in Vancouver. In the summers I was trying to get relevant experience (ie office slave work) and kept running up against the "extracurricular activities" trap in interviews.
I don't know about the University students you know or knew, but the majority of my extra-curricular activities consisted of getting drunk and trying to get some attractive young lady I didn't know (or did, depending on how much whiskey was in my system) to retire to my boudoir for an evening of slap and tickle... Sometimes this clumsy approach even worked! Most times it didn't and resulted more in just SLAP!
This did not qualify as "extra-curricular activity" in the eyes of job recruiters. So I figured I'd need some "student politics" to pad my resume...I wanted a position that wouldn't require any actual work mind you...something that had the potential for a bit of fun... so I stood for House President at the end of my second year and was elected so that in my third year I had control of the house party funds and the house VCR for my third year. My neighbour across the hall also had the largest collection of Star Trek tapes I had ever seen, so my grades dropped accordingly.
So what did this mean? I had to attend a weekly meeting of other House Presidents that made up the Residence Council. This council had nine other house presidents, then the Secretary, Treasurer, VP and President. The President was this guy named Liam, whose only noteable characteristic was that he looked like the lead singer of The Pogues.
OK, maybe he had better teeth, but the ears and face were the same...
I would've forgotten all this except for one incident that became known as "Jacket-gate." This was to teach me the true nature of government.
Close to the middle of the year, as is done in most Universities, it was time to order "the jackets." The term swag wasn't in my vocabulary back then but this was one of the payoffs: the team jacket. Usually there was a subsidy from the council of about 25% of the cost of the jacket. The rest of the cost was paid by the council-members themselves. The subsidy was seen as a "thank you" for the work being done over the year.
David, resident stoner of the council, who looked more bored than I felt, piped up with the only motion he ever pushed hard: "I move that the PVRA council be subsidized for 100% of the costs of the jackets."
David had made a variety of such "joke" motions over the entire year:
- beer subsidies to those that consumed more than 3 cases of beer in a week
- enforcement of "attractiveness standards" for attendees at "social functions"
- council meetings should be held in swim-wear (female council members only)
But he seemed serious about this one. I thought that Liam as Council President would squash this motion as he had squashed David's other joke motions but he surprised me: he allowed this to go to a vote. I think he did this because he believed that everyone would vote no, as this would in effect be diverting money from the residence council to the council members: a clear conflict of interest. At 19 I already had a clear idea about what this was about and was now no longer bored. I also had to decide how I was going to vote. Sensing things were getting out of hand, Liam decided to delay the vote 'til the next week, with the motion tabled...
And the weirdest thing happened that week: I was actively lobbied by both sides to vote their way. This was something totally new in my experience...See, the cool guys who got the chicks were strongly behind the "yes" faction. The geeky, nit-picky guys (and ALL of the girls on council) were behind the "no" faction. So in that week, I got invited to the cool parties that week by the "yes" men and got sweet-talked by the council cutey Raquel (whose nick-name was "Rocky" - in that it was reputed that she liked it ROCK-HARD) who was campaigning for Liam on the "no" side.
I wanted the jacket, but I also felt uneasy about how things looked. I was broke and paying for the damn thing meant I'd have to drink eat cheap for awhile. So when the time of the vote came I did the only thing I could do with a clear concious: I abstained.
When the votes were finally counted there were 7 votes for, 6 votes against and 1 abstention. The motion carried and we got our jackets for free. Liam was visibly nervous now: there were residents accusing him of stealing. He asked if anyone wanted to change their vote. He was staring right at me. This was a breach of procedure and he knew it but he was screwed. He told me later that guys in his house threatened him with a hazing he'd never forget if it passed (and they delivered.)
Years later I was reminded of this incident when I watched Seinfeld, with Jerry's dad Morty being impeached from the council of del Boca Vista, phase II.
So what did I learn from all this:
1. If you can control the agenda and prevent stupid votes, you should. You shouldn't assume that you have the votes to defeat a motion.
2. Never assume that people are as honest as you are.
3. Never under-estimate the power of your own greed. I could've voted "no" but chose to abstain, hoping the "yes" side would prevail so I could get my free jacket without feeling guilty...
4. If you're playing both sides against the middle, don't be surprised when neither side likes you. I didn't get invited to any more cool parties because I didn't overtly support the "yes" men and council goddess Rocky didn't talk to me the whole year (OK goddess is over-stating things - she had a nice rack but a mouth that was WAAAAAYYY too wide for her face...) because I didn't vote "no"
5. Even if you didn't vote FOR something the rabble, mob, losers voters will still blame you because you are part of the government. People saw through my cute little ploy of "abstaining" and saw my own greed.
Why does it feel like this SARS stuff is happening somewhere else? I mean is there some weird parallel universe that we're getting our news from?
I'm sitting across the table from my co-worker Dave at lunch on Thursday. We're sitting in the Food Court, which is pretty well the only source of food within walking distance. The real weirdness of North York is that you're in prime office locations, you know the ones that make you pay for monthly parking: I wish I'd got a job in the sticks somewhere...but there's no food within walking distances like downtown or Yonge and Bloor. So this little food court with only a handful of crap fast food is basically the only game in town. I practically live on their teriyaki chicken.
If you believe the tone of the news coverage in Toronto you'd believe that everyone would be in masks and that a plague had descended upon us and that judgement was nigh, but I digress...
I see zero evidence of paranoia in the crowded food court. No masks, no weirdness.
Dave and I are both eating teriyaki chicken. We eat at about the same speed (buzzsaw!) and the food is disappearing at a good pace. We're about halfway through when Dave stops eating, gets up excusing himself, and goes to the restroom. I'm sitting there eating the rest of my food. I notice Dave in the lineup at McDonald's, while his half-eaten teriyaki chicken is on the table in front of me...
Ever get that weird feeling, that compulsion to look at the accident that's messing up the on-coming traffic? I believe the term is rubber-necking. I complain about the bastards that do it when they're in the line ahead of me, but I do it myself...Well I'm getting this feeling now: I have to know WHY Dave isn't eating his teriyaki chicken.
Of course by now it's too late for me. I've finished the whole damn plate. Whatever Dave has spotted in the plate that put him off of it is probably already in my stomach, creating God knows what kind of havoc in my upper intestines...
Dave returns with two cheeseburgers, the daily special.
"Something wrong with the chicken?" I ask.
"No. I didn't want it anymore." He's looking uncomfortable.
"Why not?"
"No reason." He's silent.
We go back to work. At 2:30 I'm looking for coffee number 5. I stroll by the lunch room on my 'Quest for Caffeine' noticing several of the office girls laughing about Dave's rampant paranoia. Tracy, the loudest and fiercest of the office trolls accosts me before I get to my desk.
"What happened at lunch?"
"What d'ye mean?"
"Dave keeps washing his hands, talking 'bout the jerk who kept sneezing on his food at lunch."
"Ah, he didn't...mean me, did he? I can't remember doing anything like that..." Maybe it was me, I don't know...I am by my nature a 'multiple-sneezer', so much so that my wife waits 'til I've sneezed at least 3 times before she says "bless you."
"No, he said it was this loser sitting beside him."
"That guy? Well I don't remember him sneezing, but then again, who remembers a sneeze?"
"Well I guess everybody does these days. I mean you never know..." So spoketh the office troll (Tracy is actually quite cute, but she has the soul of a troll, so please don't flame me about my description of her.)
So. Mystery solved.
But if Dave's so scared of sneezers, why the hell didn't he inform me that my plate was potentially contaminated as well? I mean, wouldn't you? If you knew that there was potentially a recent germ-filled sneeze on someone's plate, hiding in the teriyaki sauce, wouldn't YOU save them from disgust and sickness?
This couldn't have anything to do with the office reorganization, could it?
He's not trying to get me out of the way is he? Does he know something I don't? Why is he trying to KILL ME?
Just because you're paranoid, don't mean they're not after you...
SARS doesn't even crack the top 10 of things I worry about.
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I'm trying my best to resist. Must. Be. Light. And. Funny...
I worry that I'm tapped out of subject matter. That the effin' war will take up the majority of the electrical impulses left between the dozen or so brain cells that are still firing in the hollowed-out cavity in the top of my skull.
I'm getting pissed off at the war coverage:
It's Private Lynch - not "Jessica" or "Jessie" or "'lil Jessie." She's not a lost little puppy who's been found: she's a soldier that has done her duty well - not well 'for a girl.' Am I the only damned feminist? Oh and she wants to be a kindergarten teacher. Very nice, but what does that have to do with anything?
Buzzphrases - how many times have the words "shock and awe" been rammed down our throats? Hell, they've even got me titling one of my entries "shock and awe"
The war coverage is so inept that they're resorting to covering the antics of their own reporters
Are we winning, are we losing? I dunno, and the TV can't tell me. I'm pretty well damn impressed considering that in less than a month the U.S. is getting close to Baghdad...But if I listened to some of the news commentary the U.S. should just give up and hand Saddam the keys to their cities. Oh, wait. Detroit's already done that...Well there's a lot about the 80's we'd like to forget.
I feel like the Grinch at Christmas (before the end of the story when they pussified him): "All the noise, the noise, the noise!"
NOTE: IN THIS ARTICLE I'M GOING TO SPOIL THE ENDINGS OF THE FOLLOWING MOVIES - PRESUMED INNOCENT, CITIZEN KANE. IF YOU HAVEN'T SEEN THESE MOVIES AND DON'T WANT TO SPOIL THE ENDINGS DO NOT READ ANY FURTHER. YOU HAVE BEEN WARNED.
My first room-mate after University was a guy named Dom, whom I'd been friends with for two years before we found a place (with his sorta-girlfriend/foul temptress Mel, but that's another story...)
Dom and I worked opposite shifts: I had a nine-to-five day job and Dom would work as a waiter (ie. nights, weekends etc.) so a lot of times we were home at different hours and would watch different TV shows, but one of the ones we could definitely agree on was Kids in the Hall.
It usually wound up that Dom and I would watch Kids in the Hall on CBC on Thursday at 8pm. This was the original run of the show so we'd be waiting all week for the next one to air. One Thursday I was out drinking and asked him to tape the episode for me...
I came home quite inebriated and found Dom chain-smoking and drinking a ton of coffee, typical Dom behaviour...
He hadn't taped Kids in the Hall. GRRRRR!
He proceeded to tell me about the skits GRRRRR!
He tells me about a skit where one of the characters (Hecubus the spawn of Satan!) proves to a nightclub audience how evil he is by spoiling the end of Presumed Innocent.
Kevin: Evil! Evil! Impolite and Evil! Hecubus, have you seen the movie Presumed Innocent?
Dave: Yes I have master, and his wife killed her.
Kevin: But Hecubus, I haven't seen the movie yet. Evil! Evil!
Dom is laughing his head off as he sees the look of horror on my face. I look down to the just-rented videocassette I'm holding in my left hand and THROW IT at his head...
Three years later
The years have passed but I'm still bitter. We both have moved on, each of us with new room-mates (although his room-mate was more live-in wife wannabe than mine was.) He's talking on the phone about doing a classic film night: Citizen Kane and Casablanca.
"Have you seen them?" I ask.
"Not Citizen Kane."
"Remember Presumed Innocent?" I ask.
"What are you...?" Dom starts.
"In Citizen Kane, Rosebud is his SLED!" I yell into the phone. I slam down the phone as the sounds of screams and curses echo from the earpiece.
[Rue] on 01/24/07 11:09 : With bated breath I await your return to blogging. [go]
[Rue] on 01/24/07 11:09 : With bated breath I await your return to blogging. [go]
[Rue] on 01/24/07 11:09 : With bated breath I await your return to blogging. [go]
[Rue] on 01/24/07 11:09 : With bated breath I await your return to blogging. [go]
[Rue] on 01/24/07 11:09 : With bated breath I await your return to blogging. [go]
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-- One of the Original Red Ensigns carried by the Penticton 1st Volunteers. It was present at Vimy Ridge when our little Dominion stood up and became a nation worth fighting for...
