Speaking of shameless web traffic attractions...

Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!
Paris Hilton sex tape!

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Hi there. Made ya look.

Try here.

UPDATE: Best comment on the Paris Hilton brouhaha so far goes to Jim Treacher.

Whipped I am

Well, that ends that. I was going to continue on with a lyric a day on the 21 days of cleaning, but what I found was that every lyric I wrote was nasty nasty nasty. Rue and I were thinking of sniping a bit between her blog and mine to generate a little friction (It's your fault Joy! It's really hard to have a raging hard-ass rep when you keep talking about what a nice guy I am. :-p )and maybe attract a peanut gallery for a little bit of serve and volley...Nothing like whoring for web hits!

But I find that I can't write a semi-nasty song. It's either totally nasty (and I don't wanna get in trouble with Rue- none of you know what she's capable of when aroused angry!) and very far from the truth, or it's waaaaay too nice. So this leads me to conclude that I am whipped, and that my rage can only be accessed by being really pissed off by my targets.
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Wonder what Sheila Copps has been up to lately. I REALLY hate her...

And if this is true, like Nixon, I won't have her to kick around anymore...

The 21 Days of Cleaning

So after a relatively easy week off (my first in a while...) the wife mentions "The 21 days of cleaning" that she's organizing at the moment and how I'll be called upon to act as "the muscle."

OK, the house is a mess. We moved in to the place in 2000, had the first kid in 2001, was recovering from that and cleaned up just in time for kid number 2 (where the hell did we store those old baby buntings?) I managed to unpack the old baby clothes just in time for the Punkin' (kid #2) to outgrow the newborn baby clothes.

There is a lot of stuff that needs to be got rid of before we move. So we're putting stuff up on EBAY. In case you're curious, that's what the Harpie's Bazaar button on the right links to...Right now there's a bunch of books and stuff up for sale (including my treasured first-edition Bloom Counties...Steve Dallas, you were my God!!!) with a lot more to follow.

Of course I can't have the 21 Days of Cleaning without coming up with a song- I think I'll add a verse a day until this hell comes to an end:

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(to be sung to the 12 days of Christmas)


On the first day of Cleaning, wifey suddenly became...A bitch!

(much more to follow...)