Complex Equations
From Master Flea's brooding 2AM post:
Will someone please explain women to me?
Thanks in advance.
- The Flea
Thanks in advance.
- The Flea
My response was to quote from Jack Nicholson's great speech at the end of a so-so movie: The Witches' of Eastwick:
Do you think God knew what He was doing when He created woman? Huh? No shit. I really wanna know. Or do you think it was another one of His minor mistakes like tidal waves, earthquakes, FLOODS? You think women are like that? S'matter? You don't think God makes mistakes? Of course He does. We ALL make mistakes. Of course, when WE make mistakes they call it evil. When GOD makes mistakes, they call it... nature. So whaddya think? Women... a mistake... or DID HE DO IT TO US ON PURPOSE?
I then called on Flea to divulge the source incident of his question, but he then declined to satisfy my inner gossip-whore with salacious details - Life on the web is all about salacious details. If I want discretion, I'll just mix it up locally - nobody tells me nuthin' 'round here...
But anyway. I thought I'd share my secret for dealing with women, to help all those other poor bastards out there.
Are you ready?
YOU'RE SURE?
OK. Here goes.
If written in Apple BASIC [Shaddup! That's the only programming language I ever learned for my good ol' Apple IIc...Wonder if it'll still boot...]:
=========================
10 Find out what the Woman wants
20 Give it to her
30 Goto 10
=========================
Pretty simple, huh? Line 10 seems to be the most problematic though, if you have one that doesn't respond to subtle trickery to obtain the required information...
Actually, one of my new favourite sites LiveSailDie, offers a competing formula that's applicable to both genders:
Although mine seems to require a lot less thinking, and I'm all about simplicity these days.
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Nice work!
I will be checking out your site in the future.